America, this is why we can’t have nice things.

“Hide the Pride” is a new initiative where right-wing Christians will check out LGBTQ materials from the library pride displays and won’t return them until the library agrees to remove any materials that support the LGBTQ community from their collection. That has another name. Oh, what is it again? Oh yeah. Theft! In fact, you can face legal consequences for stealing library materials and keeping them hostage while demanding the “ransom” of removing LGBTQ materials from a public library collection.

That’s Not Very Christian Of You

To clarify, public libraries are there to service EVERYONE in a community. That includes LGBTQ youths. In December, we put out displays to celebrate Christmas. In February, we put out books to support the black community. In November, we highlight books that draw attention to the elections and voting information.

By that same logic, should we also exclude the display of Christmas books around the holidays because it shows support for one religion, and that doesn’t represent the entire community? No. We give your religion its own little special place in the library when its time comes. It’s like a birthday. Everyone gets a special day, even if you don’t personally like the kid. And just because you don’t like something doesn’t mean it should be removed from community libraries. The world doesn’t revolve around you, Martha. That’s not very Christian of you, and honestly, it’s gross. If you want a library with only things you like to read, try buying the books yourself and having your own little home library. See how that works?

Stock Evil Overlord Tactics

Stark: What’s the vibranium for?
Ultron: I’m glad you asked that, because I wanted to take this time to explain my evil plan…
[Ultron shoots Stark with his concussion blasts]

— Avengers: Age of Ultron

CatholicVote ended up following the classic villain trope of divulging their entire evil plot in a nicely laid out workflow, available publicly. You can read it for yourself below:

“After collecting signatures on a letter to the library board (find the letter template at the bottom of this article or download the template here), members of the public will go to the library, find the “Pride Month” display full of LGBTQ books targeted at kids, and simply check out all those books at the front desk.

CatholicVote recommends participants take a friend or two along so multiple library cards can be used.

Having emptied the children’s “Pride” display, parents can go home and “place the Pride books on a shelf out of reach of children,” CatholicVote suggests. Finally, CatholicVote recommends sending in the letter via email or snail mail.

“As taxpayers in the city of [Your Town] and longtime library patrons, we are writing to protest the ‘Pride Month’ display in the children’s section of the [Your Town] Public Library,” the letter reads in part:

To protect our children and the community, we have checked out the books in the pride display. We plan to keep these books checked out until the library agrees to remove the inappropriate content from the shelves.

Flags, signs, and book displays based on how adults experience sexual attraction and gender identity have no place in an open and public space for children.

We believe that minor children have the right to belong to a community that respects their innocence and allows families to have conversations about sex and sexual attraction privately, and only when parents deem it appropriate.

As parents, we should be able to bring our children to the public library without exposing them to displays of adult pride.”

CatholicVote.Org

Notice the bolded section above? Yeah. That is where the theft comes in.

The Lady Doth Protest Too Much, Methinks

Yes, yes. Shakespeare, forgive me for misusing the Hamlet quote above. It doesn’t mean the same thing as it used to, but you can read all about that here. Using this quote with today’s meaning, it refers to someone who protests to something so much that their sincerity comes into question. The whole case against LGBTQ rights reeks of closeted and repressed homosexuality. Know how I know? You don’t get that upset about something unless it hits too close to home. And you don’t go around proclaiming something so much unless it is untrue and you are compensating for some deep-rooted insecurity. In this case, those so adamantly against LGBTQ culture might themselves be attracted to the same sex and have pushed it so far down that it has caused ferocious self-hatred that outwardly manifests itself at anyone within the LGBTQ community who is living their lives openly, freely, and without shame.

Example: Did you ever have a crush on someone in school, and when everyone found out, they made fun of you for it? And to hide your true feelings of embarrassment and vulnerability, you got mad about it, and denied it up and down that “No, I do NOT like Ryan Reynolds!”?

That’s exactly what we’re talking about here. (And come on, who doesn’t like Ryan Reynolds?)

Okay, but psychoanalyzing these terribly flawed individuals aside, there is one more gem from their master plan, and that is the wording of the ransom letter they would send to the library board in order to return the books. I will dissect and counter each part of this letter. Let’s begin.

We are very sorry to see that you feel this way about the books in our Pride display. As you may know, we honor different groups in the community during certain months by creating engaging and educational displays. It is not the responsibility of the library to censor what your child chooses to read. We leave that up to the discretion of the parent. If your child is checking out materials that you deem inappropriate for their age level, you are more than welcome to become an active protector in their lives. However, removing these materials from our collection would be unfair to others in the community, as we try to offer inclusive materials for all.

As is stated in the American Library Association’s (ALA’s) Library Bill of Rights,

II. Libraries should provide materials and information presenting all points of view on current and historical issues. Materials should not be proscribed or removed because of partisan or doctrinal disapproval.

Library Bill of Rights

Next section of the ransom letter:

We believe that minor children have the right to belong to a community that respects their innocence and allows families to have conversations about sex and sexual attraction privately, and only when parents deem it appropriate.

We believe that children of all life paths, including religion, sexual orientation and identity, race, gender, etc., should have access to free open information for themselves and their families.

As parents, we should be able to bring our children to the public library without exposing them to displays of adult pride.
We ask you to immediately take down your “Pride Month” displays, starting with those placed in children’s and young adults’ sections.

Exposure to varying viewpoints and ways of life offer children a chance to critically think about and understand the world. If we removed all materials you deem to be problematic from a public library, we take away the chance for children to learn and grow in a diverse world. Perhaps instead of requesting to remove the materials, you sit down and have a conversation with your child at an age you deem appropriate to answer any questions or concerns they may have about a topic.

It’s time for the American public libraries to once again be a respectful space for young children to freely explore great ideas that unite and inspire us all, rather than places where controversial and divisive new ideological movements are given free rein to promote their theories and policy positions about sexuality to children without the consent or notification of parents.

The library remains a respectful place for all children, not just those with a similar background to your own. Great ideas that unite and inspire all is exactly what we strive for as public centers for information and entertainment. The concept of controversy is subjective. What one finds controversial may not be so to someone else, and we must respect that.

Public libraries will always remain respectful places for all members of the community, regardless of background or life choices.

Respectfully,
[Insert name of library here}

In conclusion

Some of the books that stay with me until this day are some of the most controversial books I’ve ever read. Night by Elie Wiesel, 1984 by George Orwell, The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. The fact that they made me uncomfortable also meant that I was able to critically think about and empathize with a different group of people or come to terms with my own feelings about world issues. You are a combination of all the books you’ve ever read, and you are exposed to controversial situations every day in your life. Shielding your children from conflict will never help them grow into well rounded or understanding adults. If something doesn’t jive with you, have a conversation about why it makes you feel so strongly.

Don’t be ignorant. Don’t be an asshole.

But, that’s just a librarian’s opinion. What do you think?

Happy debating,
The Literary Kat